How to Manage a "Friends With Benefits" Arrangement
Sex without love is merely healthy exercise. ~ Robert A. Heinlein
Last night, I watched the new Justin Timberlake/Mila Kunis movie Friends With Benefits.
Everything started off okay, but eventually emotions started to change and things became awkward. Of course, they eventually fall in love and live happily-ever-after, which is the typical Hollywood ending. Unfortunately, these fairy-tale endings leave women hoping that they'll be able to create a similar experience in their own lives.
Don't complicate it.
If you're lucky enough to have a FWB (Friend With Benefits) in your life, you should just leave it at that. When you start to shift your original arrangement by sprinkling the confusion-dust known as "emotions" onto your FWB-Platter, you run the chance of ruining your dessert.
In fact, in Chapter 33 of my book YTWSYF, I suggested that FWB's sign a contract that would clearly define the terms and conditions of their arrangement.
Here it is:
I, (name of participant), do hereby enter into this agreement for physical purposes only with (name of other participant).
I agree that we will take the necessary measures to prevent pregnancy and STDs (including the use of birth control and/or condoms).
This partnership has been created for the sole purpose of expressing our natural (lustful) desires. If done properly, I understand that this is intended to be nothing more than a form of mutual physical exercise.
If my feelings start to change, and I feel myself becoming romantically attached to the other participant, I will inform him/her immediately. We will then sit down and discuss the terms of this contract. If mutually desired, we will then make the proper amendments.
I understand that I cannot hold the other participant responsible for my feelings, if they do not feel the same way. I intend to remain professional while under the agreements outlined in this “for physical purposes only” contract.
I accept full responsibility for my actions throughout the duration of this contract.
I understand that this agreement can be terminated at any time, by either party, for any reason.
I commit to maintaining a professional disposition after the contract ends.
I understand that any violation of this contract could result in legal action.
Signed _____________, on this, the _____ day of 2010.
Creating a quality FWB relationship can be extremely difficult (from what I hear). Remember, it should simply be a form of mutual physical exercise. It's similar to having a work-out partner at the gym — only a bit more invigorating. When you start going to dinners, movies, zoos, and spending the night, etc., you start to walk that fine line that leads to confusion.
Keep it simple.
Do your work-out.
Shower.
Get back to your life.
Most important rule: Never discuss your FWB arrangement with anyone! The private activities between two consenting adults should remain private. The quickest way to add drama to your life-experience is to share the information with your girlfriends or homies.
FYI: I'm unable to process any applications for potential FWB's at this time. Stay tuned to TheNiceLife.com for any future openings.
Click HERE for an instant Kindle, i-Pad, or Smartphone download of Your Truth Will Set You Free.
Click HERE for an instant Kindle, i-Pad, or Smartphone download of Follow The White Rabbit.
Don't forget to click the "SHARE" button below!
Categories: Relationships, Fitness, Celebrities, Conscious Creation, Delusional Thinking
Tags: can friends with benefits work justin timberlake in friends with benefits who was the girl in friends with benefits how do I make a booty call what is a booty call
Comments